{"id":1017,"date":"2010-04-10T22:44:04","date_gmt":"2010-04-10T20:44:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/?p=1017"},"modified":"2010-04-11T07:18:22","modified_gmt":"2010-04-11T05:18:22","slug":"podej-mi-zakovkou-knizku","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/prispevky\/podej-mi-zakovkou-knizku.html","title":{"rendered":"PODEJ MI \u017d\u00c1KOVSKOU KN\u00cd\u017dKU!"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dal\u0161\u00ed z tradice na\u0161\u00ed \u0161koly asi brzy skon\u010d\u00ed.\u00a0\u00a0Jde o \u017d\u00c1KOVSK\u00c9 KN\u00cd\u017dKY,\u00a0\u00a0 vizitku \u017e\u00e1kovsk\u00e9 a studentsk\u00e9\u00a0p\u00edle a \u00a0chov\u00e1n\u00ed.\u00a0Na n\u011bkter\u00fdch \u0161kol\u00e1ch jsou postupn\u011b\u00a0\u00a0nahrazov\u00e1ny jejich elektronickou podobou. M\u00e1 to sv\u00e9 d\u016fvody a ur\u010dit\u011b i jist\u00e9 v\u00fdhody proti t\u00e9 tradi\u010dn\u00ed-pap\u00edrov\u00e9 form\u011b. Tu elektronickou nelze\u00a0 nikdy zapomenout doma, nemn\u016f\u017ee se jen tak lehce \u00a0ztratit. Nedaj\u00ed se v n\u00ed p\u0159episovat zn\u00e1mky, nebo vytrh\u00e1vat \u010di dopl\u0148ovat listy, p\u0159ipisovat jedni\u010dky…To v\u0161e\u00a0 je\u00a0technicky zabezpe\u010den\u00e9 a zaji\u0161t\u011bn\u00e9 proti ne\u017e\u00e1douc\u00ed manipulaci. I kdy\u017e, \u00a0jak zn\u00e1me na\u0161e \u017e\u00e1ky, ur\u010dit\u011b si i s t\u00edmto\u00a0probl\u00e9mem v kr\u00e1tk\u00e9m\u00a0\u010dase n\u011bjak porad\u00ed!<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/em>\u00a0<\/p>\n

V\u00a0ohmatan\u00fdch desk\u00e1ch m\u00e1m doma schovan\u00e9 v\u0161echny sv\u00e9 „b\u00fdval\u00e9“ \u017e\u00e1kovsk\u00e9 kn\u00ed\u017eky. Od 3.ro\u010dn\u00edku\u00a0 osmilety a\u017e k maturit\u011b. Je to pro mne i m\u00e9 bl\u00edzk\u00e9 takov\u00e1\u00a0koncentrovan\u00e1 \u0161koln\u00ed kronika, ze kter\u00e9 se d\u00e1 vy\u010d\u00edst, jak\u00fd jsem byl student.\u00a0Je to ale z\u00e1rove\u0148\u00a0i ur\u010dit\u00e1 vizitka\u00a0 m\u00fdch\u00a0u\u010ditel\u016f.\u00a0Vypov\u00edd\u00e1 o jejich slovesn\u00fdch schopnostech a slohov\u00e9 originalit\u011b.\u00a0Vypov\u00edd\u00e1\u00a0 o jejich klasifika\u010dn\u00ed taktice a\u00a0schopnosti \u00a0hodnocen\u00ed m\u00e9 tehdej\u0161\u00ed \u0161koln\u00ed pr\u00e1ce.<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 To v\u0161echno\u00a0 p\u0159ipravovanou zm\u011bnou docela zmiz\u00ed. Je to \u0161koda, nebo je to tak spr\u00e1vn\u011b? Dnes zat\u00edm jen t\u011b\u017eko soudit. Ale jist\u00e9 je, \u017ee v\u0161echno na co se kolem n\u00e1s pod\u00edv\u00e1me, se prom\u011b\u0148uje.Z\u00e1konit\u011b se\u00a0m\u011bn\u00ed\u00a0i \u0161kola a zp\u016fsoby evidence a hodnocen\u00ed \u017e\u00e1k\u016f.<\/p>\n

A proto\u017ee je\u00a0u\u017e skoro polovina \u00a0dubna, kter\u00fd jsem ned\u00e1vno na sv\u00e9m blogu nazval\u00a0„M\u011bs\u00edcem legrace“, pou\u017eiji v\u00fdpisky z pozn\u00e1mek ud\u011blen\u00fdch \u017e\u00e1k\u016fm v\u00a0\u017e\u00e1kovsk\u00fdch kn\u00ed\u017ek\u00e1ch, tak jak je ob\u010das dost\u00e1v\u00e1m od sv\u00fdch zn\u00e1m\u00fdch, kte\u0159\u00ed m\u011b t\u00edmto laskav\u00fd\u00a0 zp\u016fsobem cht\u011bj\u00ed pop\u00edchnout a p\u0159ipomenout, co \u017ee jsme to my u\u010ditel\u00e9\u00a0 za divnou komunitu… Ale mo\u017en\u00e1 mi\u00a0t\u00edm cht\u011bj\u00ed uk\u00e1zat, jak je \u010destina vtipn\u00fd jazyk a jak\u00a0je mo\u017en\u00e9\u00a0\u00a0t\u011bmi co to dob\u0159e um\u00ed, sv\u00e9 \u017e\u00e1ky\u00a0i jejich rodi\u010de\u00a0p\u0159\u00edjemn\u011b pobavit.<\/p>\n

Tak\u017ee \u010dt\u011bte a spolu se mnou hledejte smysl takov\u00fdch vzkaz\u016f. Mo\u017en\u00e1 \u017ee se tam dokonce i pozn\u00e1te\u00a0. Dob\u0159e se p\u0159i tom bavte !\u00a0<\/p>\n

Znehodnotil n\u00e1st\u011bnn\u00fd v\u00fdtisk Mend\u011blejevovy soustavy prvk\u016f vymy\u0161len\u00fdm prvkem Spermium.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0O hodin\u011b p\u0159\u00edrodopisu strk\u00e1 pt\u00e1ka do topen\u00ed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Celou hodinu si p\u0159erovn\u00e1v\u00e1 pytl\u00edk. Takhle se nic nenau\u010d\u00ed!<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Nevhodn\u011b nos\u00ed do vyu\u010dov\u00e1n\u00ed \u017ev\u00fdkac\u00ed a jin\u00e9 gumy.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Byl p\u0159isti\u017een ve \u0161koln\u00ed j\u00eddeln\u011b, jak l\u00edb\u00e1 spolu\u017ea\u010dku, m\u00e1me podez\u0159en\u00ed na l\u00e1sku.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Plive kuli\u010dky z \u017eelezn\u00e9 trubi\u010dky.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Mo\u010d\u00ed do v\u00fd\u0161e o\u010d\u00ed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0P\u0159i hodin\u011b d\u011bjepisu troubil sto\u010den\u00fdm se\u0161item st\u00e1tn\u00ed hymnu!<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Vyj\u00e1d\u0159il se o Meresjevovi, \u017ee m\u011bl amputovan\u00e9 nohy a\u017e po prdel.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Nos\u00ed do \u0161koly p\u0159\u00edli\u0161 kr\u00e1tk\u00e9 sukn\u011b, tak\u017ee vzbuzuje u spolu\u017e\u00e1k\u016f v\u011bt\u0161\u00ed pozornost ne\u017e j\u00e1 se sv\u00fdm v\u00fdkladem, pros\u00edm o prodlou\u017een\u00ed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Ml\u00e1t\u00ed lavic\u00ed o strop.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Lezl do p\u011btimetrov\u00e9 v\u00fd\u0161ky na t\u0159\u00edmetrov\u00fd strom.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Vyndala p\u0159i hodin\u011b t\u011blesn\u00e9 v\u00fdchovy bez dovolen\u00ed kozu a cel\u00e1 t\u0159\u00edda p\u0159es n\u00ed sk\u00e1kala.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Jezd\u00ed nosem po lavici, aby to p\u00edskalo.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Rozbila spolu\u017e\u00e1kovi sva\u010dinu.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Ma\u017ee tabuli p\u0159\u00edli\u0161 mokrou houbou.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0P\u0159i m\u00e9 hodin\u011b se sna\u017eil b\u00fdt hodn\u00fd. A\u017e moc.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Sv\u00fdm zp\u011bvem \u00famysln\u011b ru\u0161\u00ed hodinu hudebn\u00ed v\u00fdchovy.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Po\u0159\u00e1d se hl\u00e1s\u00ed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Nech\u00e1 se od spolu\u017e\u00e1k\u016f osah\u00e1vat a nehl\u00e1s\u00ed to u\u010diteli.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0V hodin\u011b t\u011blesn\u00e9 v\u00fdchovy si ode\u0161el zakou\u0159it.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0P\u0159i v\u00fdlet\u011b do Terez\u00edna se nechal zav\u0159\u00edt do plynov\u00e9 komory.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Honza zak\u0159i\u010del: „Ticho!“, t\u0159\u00edda ho vysly\u0161ela a on ze sebe vypustil toxick\u00e9 plyny, co\u017e bylo sly\u0161et po cel\u00e9 t\u0159\u00edd\u011b.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0P\u0159i hodin\u011b hraje pi\u0161kvorky a pak bu\u010f nad\u00e1v\u00e1, nebo se hlasit\u011b raduje.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Olizuje temperov\u00e9 barvy a div\u00ed se, \u017ee pak zvrac\u00ed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0V\u00e1\u0161 syn pova\u017euje za samoz\u0159ejm\u00e9 se p\u0159i hodin\u011b matematiky proch\u00e1zet po lavic\u00edch.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>\u017d\u00e1k o hodin\u011b \u017ev\u00fdk\u00e1 \u017ev\u00fdka\u010dku, j\u00e1 mu ale jen povolil sn\u00edst chl\u00e9b.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Nem\u011bl \u017e\u00e1kovskou kn\u00ed\u017eku a odm\u00edtl mi ji d\u00e1t.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Ve\u0161el jsem do t\u0159\u00eddy a on se mi nepostavil.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Sm\u011bje se mi za z\u00e1dy do o\u010d\u00ed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Kdy\u017e jsem odstartoval p\u0159espoln\u00ed b\u011bh, utekl dom\u016f.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Nesd\u011blil sv\u00e9 jm\u00e9no s t\u00edm, \u017ee je tu inkognito.<\/span>Kdykoliv je vyvol\u00e1n, kouk\u00e1 na m\u011b jako na idiota a pt\u00e1 se, jestli to mysl\u00edm v\u00e1\u017en\u011b.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Bez dovolen\u00ed pad\u00e1 ze \u017eidle.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Vyvol\u00e1n prohl\u00e1sil, \u017ee nebude odpov\u00eddat bez advok\u00e1ta.<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u0160kola nen\u00ed holubn\u00edk<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Pravideln\u011b chod\u00ed do \u0161koly nepravideln\u011b.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Na hodinu fyziky p\u0159i\u0161el o 45 minut pozd\u011bji.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Ten roste pro krimin\u00e1l<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0P\u0159inesl do hodiny pr\u00e1\u0161ek na pe\u010den\u00ed a p\u0159edst\u00edral prodej drog. Odm\u00edtal v\u0161e vydat a nyn\u00ed i p\u0159iznat.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sebral t\u0159\u00eddn\u00ed knihu, nechce ji vr\u00e1tit a \u017e\u00e1d\u00e1 v\u00fdkupn\u00e9.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Vyhro\u017euje mi smrt\u00ed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u017d\u00e1d\u00e1 od u\u010ditele lep\u0161\u00ed zn\u00e1mku se \u017eeleznou ty\u010d\u00ed v ruce.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0P\u0159i hodin\u011b d\u011bjepisu zap\u00e1lil lavici a nav\u00e1d\u011bl zbytek t\u0159\u00eddy, aby m\u011b up\u00e1lili.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Nerespektuje pokyny dozoru o p\u0159est\u00e1vce, na napomenut\u00ed reaguje: „M\u016f\u017eu se na to vysr….!“<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>P\u0159inesla do \u0161koly DYMOGAM (z\u00e1paln\u00e1 tableta proti hmyzu – pozn. red.)\u00a0 a vykou\u0159ila cel\u00fd u\u010ditelsk\u00fd sbor.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Kdy\u017e jsem va\u0161eho syna vyvolala k tabuli, op\u00e1\u010dil mi: „Pi\u0161 p\u011bt, sva\u010d\u00edm!“<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0V\u00e1\u0161 syn mi dnes za\u010dal tykat, sk\u00e1kal mi do v\u00fdkladu a cht\u011bl vid\u011bt m\u016fj diplom.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Simuloval zvon\u011bn\u00ed \u0161koln\u00edho zvonku bud\u00edkem, a kdy\u017e se mu na to p\u0159i\u0161lo, \u00a0je\u0161t\u011b tvrdil, \u017ee ho o to \u0161koln\u00edk po\u017e\u00e1dal.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0V\u00e1\u0161 syn p\u0159i vyvol\u00e1n\u00ed k tabuli zak\u0159i\u010del, \u017ee chyb\u00ed, vysko\u010dil oknem a zav\u0159el se na z\u00e1chod\u011b.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>B\u011bh\u00e1 po t\u0159\u00edd\u011b a zvrac\u00ed \u017eidli\u010dky.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0V\u00e1\u0161 syn rozkopal venkovn\u00ed odpadkov\u00fd ko\u0161 a m\u00e9 auto, kdy\u017e se dozv\u011bd\u011bl, \u017ee propad\u00e1 z chemie.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Ohro\u017eoval spolu\u017e\u00e1ky no\u017eem, kter\u00fd pot\u0159eboval a\u017e na t\u0159et\u00ed hodinu.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0V\u00e1\u0161 syn sn\u011bdl u\u010debn\u00ed pom\u016fcku (a\u017e pozd\u011bji se vysv\u011btlilo, \u017ee \u0161lo o z\u00e1ti\u0161\u00ed \u00a0jablka s mrkv\u00ed), a tak si u\u010ditel m\u00edsto v\u00fdtvarn\u00e9 v\u00fdchovy s \u017e\u00e1ky pov\u00eddal o \u017eivot\u011b.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dal\u0161\u00ed z tradice na\u0161\u00ed \u0161koly asi brzy skon\u010d\u00ed.\u00a0\u00a0Jde o \u017d\u00c1KOVSK\u00c9 KN\u00cd\u017dKY,\u00a0\u00a0 vizitku \u017e\u00e1kovsk\u00e9 a studentsk\u00e9\u00a0p\u00edle a \u00a0chov\u00e1n\u00ed.\u00a0Na n\u011bkter\u00fdch \u0161kol\u00e1ch jsou postupn\u011b\u00a0\u00a0nahrazov\u00e1ny jejich elektronickou podobou. M\u00e1 to sv\u00e9 d\u016fvody a ur\u010dit\u011b i jist\u00e9 v\u00fdhody proti t\u00e9 tradi\u010dn\u00ed-pap\u00edrov\u00e9 form\u011b. Tu elektronickou nelze\u00a0 nikdy zapomenout doma, nemn\u016f\u017ee se jen tak lehce \u00a0ztratit. Nedaj\u00ed se v n\u00ed p\u0159episovat zn\u00e1mky, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":33,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[313,307,293],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1017","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nocnicek","category-sobotnicek","category-zivotni"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1017","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/33"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1017"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1017\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1101,"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1017\/revisions\/1101"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1017"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1017"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogy.rvp.cz\/dedvseved\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1017"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}